Let’s be fair, you can’t have much going for you when anagram makers dwell on your name for a nano second before shouting “Scab Villain”.
After his Croatia team were rolled over by England, the fun anagram aficionados can have with your moniker is presumably the last thing on Slavan Bilic’s mind this morning.
Generating implausible excuses which might go down well back home but are regarded as laughable by anyone with half a brain would seem more appropriate.
“They stole our magical yak” or “Our players all caught swine flu in London” might fit the bill nicely.
Instead, the refreshingly honest Bilic openly admitted his team were second best. “We didn’t expect this in our worst nightmares,” he said.
“They were fantastic from the start. They played their own game and they looked the sharper, more aggressive side even before the first goal.”
“I would like to congratulate them for a fantastic performance.”
His team may not make it past the play offs but Bilic gets my vote for his cliche free approach to footy speak.
Here are the scores from last night’s other games:
Europe
Group 1
Albania 1-1 Denmark
Hungary 0-1 Portugal
Malta 0-1 Sweden
Denmark (18 pts) meet Sweden (15) in Copenhagen in October. If Portugal (13) and Hungary (13) draw on the same night, superior goal difference means the Danes only need a point to take the group.
Group 2
Israel 7-0 Luxembourg
Latvia 2-2 Switzerland
Moldova 1-1 Greece
More draws. Does no-one want to win this group? The Swiss have 17 pts, with Greece and Latvia on 14.
Group 3
Northern Ireland 0-2 Slovakia
Slovenia 3-0 Poland
Czech Republic 7-0 San Marino
Slovakia (19) are on the verge of automatic qualification. With one game to play, Northern Ireland (14) need a miracle or the Protestant equivalent to overcome Slovenia, who have two games remaining.
Group 4
Wales 1-3 Russia
Germany 4-0 Azerbaijan
Liechtenstein 1-1 Finland
Russia (21) and Germany (22) are still determined to keep this group interesting, even though everyone else gave up on it months ago.
Group 5
Spain 3-0 Estonia
Armenia 2-1 Belgium
Bosnia-Herzegovina 1-1 Turkey
Spain qualify.
Group 6
England 5-1 Croatia
Belarus 0-0 Ukraine
Andorra 1-3 Kazakhstan
England qualify. Woo-hoo.
Group 7
Romania 1-1 Austria
Serbia 1-1 France
Faroe Islands 2-1 Lithuania
This group will probably go down to the last matches unless the French (15) give up early and concede to Serbia (19).
Group 8
Italy 2-0 Bulgaria
Montenegro 1-1 Cyprus
A runners up place is probably already in the bag for The Republic of Ireland (16). Beat Italy (20) in Dublin next month and they might make this group interesting.
Group 9
Scotland 0-1 Holland
Norway 2-1 FYR Macedonia
Does this group deserve a runners up spot? No.
South America
Paraguay 1-0 Argentina
Brazil 4-2 Chile
Bolivia 1-3 Ecuador
Uruguay 3-1 Colombia
Venezuela 3-1 Peru
Paraguay qualify.
Argentina slip into fifth place. If it stays this way they will play off against the fourth placed team in the North, Central America and Caribbean group. So they should probably qualify anyway.
Asian Play-off 2
Saudi Arabia 2-2 Bahrain
2-2 on aggregate
Bahrain will play New Zealand in the Asia/Oceania Inter-Continental Play-Off.
Africa
Group A
Cameroon 2 Gabon 1
Cameroon now head the group. Roger Miller can relax in his armchair – for now.
North, Central America and Caribbean
Trinidad and Tobago 0-1 USA
El Salvador 1-0 Costa Rica
Mexico 1-0 Honduras
The USA lead the group on 16 points. One more victory should guarantee qualification.
